作者： 360abc

Emily: Actually, there’s a way to keep the kitchen god from telling the bad things you did.
Joice: What is it? Tell me! Will it work for Lester, too?
Emily: I think so! Just serve a lot of sweet dishes next week. That will make the kitchen god say sweet things about you!
Joice: Hmm. Are you sure that will work? I already tried giving chocolate to Lester.
Emily: And what happened?
Joice: His face broke out and he said it was my fault!

serve (v.) 　
（以食物）款待

break out 　
（脸上）冒出痘痘
A: Do you want some chocolate? 你要来点巧克力吗？
B: No, thanks. Chocolate makes my skin break out. 不了，多谢。巧克力会让我长痘痘。

艾蜜莉：其实有个方法可以让灶神不说出你的过失。
乔伊丝：什么方法？跟我说！这对莱斯特也管用吗？
艾蜜莉：我觉得啦！下星期你就多准备点甜食。这可以让灶神说你的好话！
乔伊丝：呣。你确定那会有效吗？我已经试过请莱斯特吃巧克力了。
艾蜜莉：那后来呢？
乔伊丝：他脸上的痘痘冒了出来，还说是我的错！

Emily: Our supervisor Lester does. Actually, Lester is kind of like the kitchen god.
Joice: The kitchen god? What does he do?
Emily: He just stays in the kitchen and watches you. Before the Chinese New Year, the kitchen god tells his boss whether you were good or bad this year. Just like Lester does!
Joice: Oh, no! I did a lot of bad things this year. I hope the kitchen god isn’t like Lester–he blabs my mistakes to everybody!

kitchen god 　
灶神 。农历十二月二十四日是传统上「送灶」的日子，灶神会在这一天回天庭向玉皇大帝报告这一家人的功过，所以家家户户会用甜食抹在灶神嘴上，希望祂的嘴能甜一点

supervisor (n.) 　
监督者，上司

blab (v.) 　
泄漏（秘密），（有意无意地）提到
A: Do you like Joanne? 你喜欢乔安吗？
B: She’s OK, but she always likes to blab about how successful her husband is. 她还可以啦，不过她老爱提她老公有多成功。

艾蜜莉：是我们的上司莱斯特。莱斯特其实就有点像是灶神。
乔伊丝：灶神？他是做什么的？
艾蜜莉：他就只是待在厨房盯着你。到了农历年前，灶神就去跟他老板报告你这一年的表现是好是坏。就跟莱斯特一样！
乔伊丝：糟了！我今年出了很多锤。希望灶神不会跟莱斯特一样，净跟大家数落我的不是！

Emily: Look who you get to sit next to–Tim from purchasing!
Joice: Ewww! That weirdo?! He really gives me the creeps!
Emily: Don’t worry. I’m also sitting next to you.
Joice: I just hope he doesn’t start bragging again!
Emily: I can’t wait until we get our year-end bonus!
Joice: Me, either! Who decides how much money we get?

weirdo (n.) 　
怪胎

brag (v.) 　
自吹自擂
A: Amy’s so stuck up! 爱咪真是骄傲！ B: I know. She’s always bragging about how good her English is. 我知道。她老是吹嘘自己的英文有多好。

purchase (v.) 　
购买。文中的purchasing系指「采购部」purchasing department

give…the creeps 　
让（某人）起鸡皮疙瘩
A: Have you ever been in a graveyard at night? 你有在晚上去过坟墓吗？ B: Yeah, but it gave me the creeps. 有，但我全身起鸡皮疙瘩。

艾蜜莉：你看坐你旁边的是谁–是采购部门的提姆！
乔伊丝：恶！那个怪胎？！他真是让我起鸡皮疙瘩！
艾蜜莉：别担心。我也坐在你旁边。
乔伊丝：只希望他别又开始吹牛了！
艾蜜莉：我等不及要拿年终奖金！
乔伊丝：我也是啊！是谁决定我们拿多少钱？